Post Christmas frenzy

Hi, I've been so busy the past few weeks that I realized I've not posted for more than a fortnight! Anyway I've been scrapping quite a bit and I'll let the pictures do the talking! The bookmark my favourite little cousin, Ron, 'pestered' me for weeks! I added the train felt from Queen & Co because he loves Thomas trains. This is the closest to that I can find for him! Did these two layouts with Jillian and Shannon! I helped them with their layouts and they totally loved them! This is Jillian and her pink xmas layout! This is Shannon and her 'Bombastic Hair' layout! My favourite layout so far for this festive month! It is made specially as a Xmas present for Yap!! Totally love this reindeer! I almost forgot to put this up. My altered item of the month, DREAM. I love this word. The only word that brings me beyond my imagination. It is in this that makes life worth living. It's been rather quiet this Christmas. No presents, no parties, no dressing up and for the first time, no last-minute shopping. It's quite therapeutic to spend it this quietly in a such a tranquil manner. I'm starting to speak like an old lady, well I've always felt out of place. Like an old lady trapped in a young woman's body since years back. I'm beginning to accept this though. How's your Christmas?

Compulsive Gambling

The old adage notwithstanding, money is not the root of all evil, compulsive gambling is. To put it in dichotomy, there are 2 kinds of peope in this world, the first kind who gamble within their limits and the second who do not. Most of us, like myself, are the the first kind. You gamble when you make a wager with your friends, you gamble when you get attracted to bad jerks, you take a major gamble they day you marry your husband or wife. Point is, everyone gambles. When we are born into this world, we are taking gambles so we are the first kind of people to begin with. I'm stating the above because I'm pretty comfortable with the first kind of gamblers, being one myself. What I hate and despise most (at least for now) are the second kind of gamblers whom I affectionately call COMPULSIVE GAMBLERS. They are the ones who gamble without limits. They even dare to gamble what they do not have. Just like compulsive borrowers (shall be ranted some other day), they are people whom I refer to as people who lack foresight. They execute things without thinking of consequences but unlike law offenders, they are not persecuted by the law and so, 'sad to say that these people disrupt their own families and when desperate, may even turn to committing crimes. Am I exaggerating? I hope not, because I've seen cases of people turning to crime to feed their vices. These people devote their ives to making gambling their only job and when they lose, they borrow and pile up mountains of debt. When this happens, they leave their loved ones with no choice but to pay for them. Yes, I expect life to be unfair but it has to be reasonable most times, not? To date, I've not seen any gambler make a home out of a winning fortune, yet I've seen countless gamblers bankrupt and implicating their families and friends shunning them. It's sad, I know. That's why it has always been my principle NEVER to help any gambler friends with loans. I know I will do them more harm than good. They always give the same pathetic, desperate face but seriously, what right do they have to waver your heart when it is their mistake to bear? Today, is the FIRST and the LAST time I'm helping someone clear debts, not because I'm going against my principles, but it is for blood. This person implicated my brother into gambling. It will be my brother's first and last brush with this menacing habit. As for the compulsive gambler, I sincerely hope he will mend his ways. He looks like such a good boy, but he has an unforgivable habit. I don't care if I'm going to be berated for shaming them. I'm sharing this because I personally want to drive home this message, especially to compulsive gamblers, that gambling is an ENDLESS RUT. By being so self-centered, you're not only going to hurt yourself, you're going to hurt those who love you.

More scrapping!

Scrapping just keeps me at home on most days. With the economic downturn, I guess it's a relief that I'm playing with papers instead of shopping for dresses and shoes. A layout of Slave Yap & me. Did this for Jing's birthday. It comes with a card, but I forgot to take a picture of the card. LOL In any way, I hope the card with bookmark is more useful than just a card alone. Really hope I can do more for my good friend but I was really busy with exams. I'm definitely gonna make her birthday a more memorable one next year! :) Love this girl! She does not have the kindest words for you but you know she is speaking the truth instead of faking the niceties. This world really needs more people like her!

Living not merely for myself

I just did a layout on my outing with my relatives at Sentosa. It's one of the rare times we can get together . What's even more pleasant is that I ran into Miao there when he was doing a photo shoot. Being the kind friend he was(lol), he took some photographs for us! While doing the layout, I was having some random thoughts. Have you ever felt that the older you get, the more attached you will feel towards your family? I've this feeling quite some time ago. I love the cozy feeling of being at home, it's like a shelter I can run to whenever I encounter problems. It's totally the opposite a few years back when I was younger. I'll break house rules and run to my friends instead. These days, I'll reprimand my parents if they stay out late and stuff. Tsk tsk. I figured that I want to spend more time with my parents and enjoy being a Daddy and Mummy's girl instead of shaking my butts at some club. I'm not a clubber anyway, so this makes a bad comparison. Eh maybe I enjoy being with them than shopping? Logically, my true friends will stay by me for my life time but my parents will not. They've changed so fast, apparently faster than the rate my little cousins are growing. My mum was complaining of menopause aches and Dad was no longer dancing around me for more than a few minutes. Sigh.. I wonder how many more good years I have left with them before I move out and live my own life. My sister, Christine, and I are obviously not coping very well with this morbid mindset. We're taking every chance to stay at home to spend more time with our family. Unfortunately, the two other siblings of mine just simply have not yet shared the same sentiments. I'm celebrating life each day because I've a complete and healthy family. For the first time in my life, I feel the reason for living. Just love this feeling right now. :)

Post exam thoughts

The past weeks have been really draining for me. I felt so relieved after my last paper on Wed but I have been really busy with other things. Went for a couple of casting which I doubt will be successful. My eye infection is still haunting me. And I just came back from a Sasa event. I am so tired that I didn't take any pictures except for the bookmark I made during the exam period. lol I'll leave you with the bookmarks I made for my aunt and cousin! Goodnight! PS: Rebecca, thanks for changing my blogskin for me! :)

Bookmarks!

Hi people! I've no idea what happened to my blog but it's difficult to put the pictures up without eating into the space of my text! Arrgh!! Can someone give some advice? I've not been all good during the exam periods, instead of making layouts, I made bookmarks here and there. Really love my design so I did a few others. Will be back with more pictures of other bookmarks! My last paper is on Wednesday, I'm so excited!! :)

Alpha L :)

Oh my. I scrapped again today. Can't be helped! After half a day at MWL, I went to Spotlight to buy these lovely stuff. So I can't resist making a pretty art on this! I'm in a really good mood today, finally saw Gladys after a long time. We chatted and shopped at MWL for a while today. I better control my spending before it gets out of hand. And Lena, thanks for the really sweet message today, I feel so much better after reading that. To be honest, I am not very satisfied with the work I submitted for the DT call. As much as I do not like to engage in self-handicapping, I really have no time to rush out the 5 items required for the application! I did them all in a week, so not very good quality there. -.-'' It doesn't help that Slave Yap is extremely critical of my work but this is really helpful so that I will work harder. That's why I'm really appreciative of Lena's message! It's really encouraging, not to say the least! :) I better get started on my studies, my test is TWO DAYS away!! Thanks for looking, if there's anyone looking. LOL

Guess what?

I woke up at 6 and scrapped my whole day away. This comes at the expense of my upcoming exams!! Arrgh! Now I'm experiencing this mixed feelings. Happy that I've finished a layout I'm kinda pleased with, but super pissed with myself that I've NOT started on my exam revision. Arrggh! To make up for this guilt, I shall pose up my scrap layout!! Really love this, I will most probably enter it for the DT call by MWL. I still need two more layouts and the deadline is on this coming thurs!! This is making me real nervous! Have a good week ahead! I'm retreating into my world of notes now.. :(

Scrap day!

Hello everyone! You'll be surprised that how I spent my week. Instead of mugging like any other self-respecting student, I've been scrapping all day long!! I'm so so so bad, unforgivable as my first paper starts next Sat!! Here are some layouts I've done over the week.. I did this on Wed when Rebecca came over instead of preparing for my presentation! It's thanksgiving month in US. Though we don't celebrate it in Singapore, I find it really meaningful. How many of us are thankful for everything we have? I'm thankful for having great friends, a supportive family and my very own existence. I don't want to leave this world regretfully without thanking my loved ones. So here I am, putting my scrapping to some use.. Counting my blessings. :) Worked on this layout the whole of today! No studying done at all, only scrapping, scrapping and scrapping! Lol Love this 'home' layout, supposed to title it 'family' but I'm lazy to stamp two more alphabets.. I'm getting very inspired these days, keep blog stalking scrapbook designers' blogs. I might enter this for the Design Team call at Made with love. Hee My worst layout. I did it last night till 6 in the morning.. I'm still looking at it, wondering why it looks so incomplete. Hope I can alter it and make it better soon.. Rebecca suggested that I should start a shop designing layouts for people who do not scrap.. Sounds like a really foreign idea to me as I don't think anyone will want to pay someone to scrap. Hmm, she is pretty confident that it'll work. haha I will consider after the exams cos I love to scrap! Now, back to mugging.. Goodnight!

Clean and Green Singapore

It's really an eye-opener for me last Wednesday when I attended the Clean and Green Singapore with Carol, Wann Wah and Vivien, as Miss Earth representatives. Those little kids really amazed me with their abilities to communicate green messages across and best of all, their genuine passion in participating in this green movement. As a typical Singaporean, I am both skeptical and cynical about the green movement here in the local context, despite being one of the winners of Miss Earth. This is a trip I'll come to appreciate for a long time to come. Seeing how passionate and devoted these students are in putting up a good show and presentations at their respective booths really humbled me in ways I couldn't describe. I had never ever participated in such meaningful events as a student in my teens so you can imagine my awe when I'm approached by kids as young as 7 telling me about how they plan to go about saving the environment. Of course, they are not green missionaries overnight but you can never deny how well they have been nurtured by their school teachers to care for our Earth. I have been spending some time lately after this event learning more about (and thinking a lot about) clean energy, composting and organic gardening, conscious consumption and green living in general. While organic gardening may be a constraint in our land-tight island, we can sure do more in terms of composting (cool idea, an eight-year-old showed me their compost and how it can contribute as nutrients back to the soil and plants, our food producer) and conscious consumption (think hybrid cars!). I'm always grateful to what Mother Theresa once said, "One can do no great things, only small things with great love". Though Slave Yap thinks (he still does..) we, ordinary beings, can never do as much as the policy makers or even superpower nations such as the US in the environment arena to make as big an impact, I still want to do what I can in small ways. Small changes to make, something within or beyond your homes to conserve energy, to make this planet a little greener, a little better and a little cleaner. If everyone plays a part, we can initiate change and hopefully, the authorities will someday do too. Sounds like another Miss Earth's campaign speech huh? LOL Back stage where the young girls don their "recycled costumes" Such a pity that we did not have time to take pictures of them! They looked so confident and pretty! 3 of us without Ivy, who is away for the international Ms Earth competition in Manila! Best of luck, Ivy! : Darn, I hate standing beside Wann Wah!! Whines. More pictures after Vivien sent me the photos! I took a nice picture with a really cute girl who tugged at me, saying "I love your tiara, it's so nice!" to have her friends pulling her away and being apologetic about her act! She's so funny, just like when I was young. lol That's all for today, back to mugging for the coming exams!' xoxo wuling PS: I just saw Shi Ying's comment! Thanks for that little interaction dating back to a month ago, it makes my day! :)

To live in content

"To live content with small means; to seek elegance rather than luxury; and refinement rather than fashion; to be worthy, not respectable; and wealthy, not rich; to study hard, think quietly, talk gently, act frankly; to listen to stars and birds, to babes and sages, with open heart; to bear all cheerfully, do all bravely, await occasion, hurry never; in a word, to let the spiritual, unbidden and unconscious grow up through the common. This is to be my symphony." [ William Henry Channing ] I'm struggling with this though this is inspiring. How many of us can live in content and be debt-free? We incur mountains of debts the moment we are born in this world. Many people at my age live in such comfort that we fail to realise that life isn't just about getting the latest bag or mobile to show off. Every time you ask your parents to buy you that branded bag or latest phone, have you thought about whether you really need it? Or have you thought about how difficult it is for them to fork out the money for your luxury on top of the car loan, house loan and daily expenses? I don't know how others are coping, I just want to humble myself a little today by reflecting on my extravagant habits and most importantly, I want to be grateful to my parents who brought me to this world with unconditional love. In spite of our very frequent, recent quarrels, I love you, Dad and Mum. I truly do.

Best of both worlds?

You have really taught me well. Remember how you used to tell me that I can only choose between my studies and tuition? I finally gave up being angry about not doing well in my studies cos I couldn't bear to neglect my tuition kids. To think that I've to remind you to make a choice. I hate either choice you make but you gotta make a decision between studies and me. I'll help since it's such a tough decision. Choose studies cos you won't regret for sure! Best of both worlds? You wish.

updates!

Hi there! I've finally moved! I hope the kiddos will leave me at that! A few updates!! Really appreciate my dear friends who take time out to celebrate lumpy and my birthday.. Happy apple cum lumpy day!! The 3 behind doing their usual pose Love my girlfriends! Love Fun and her BIKER friends. Lol! Love jing and the phone chat we had a week ago. Love lumpy for her place to "nua"! Yappy and I! Wondering why I'm in a good mood today?! My first stamp shipment just arrived!! Hee I am so excited about packing the respective goods for Lena, Gladys, Grace and Yvonne that I decided to try the new alphabet stamps as a big name tag for their goodies! This is real fun.. It was Rebecca's 21st birthday last Sunday and I'm so proud of myself for making a guestbook for her! Did her make-up for her as well. Here are the pictures, as someone complained that my blog is too wordy! I coloured the cat and balloons!! I just so love Penny Black stamps and Prima flowers! Still, I will keep this blog MY venting outlet when I'm unhappy, so too bad for not being crowd-pleasing! Back to doing my term paper, arrgh!! Can't believe I can have a happy post today! It must be scrapbooking, it must be. :)

Birthday woes

So my birthday's over and as expected, it's the worst birthday I ever had so far. No one to blame as it was self-intended. Why was it intended? Simply because I'm very unhappy with my life and I was hit by an even unhappier news on the eve of my birthday. My world came crashing down once more (ever since the rocky years in sec sch) and this time round, it's got nothing to do with my friends or in relationships. It's something personal and I doubt I'll ever have the courage to pen it down here. Being a Libra, I've always looked forward to my birthday with high expectations and great hopes. Never once have I been happy since the 15th birthday but I never gave up. Until this birthday, I've completely zero expectation for it to turn out fine. All I want is to run to the deserted beach and yell my head off OR hide in an empty house and cry the day off. I'm not hard to please. Never once had I asked for a branded present or anything. In fact, I never conjure any "birthday presents" I want from anybody. I always and still believe that birthday gifts should be expressed from my loved ones' hearts, now what I want them to give me. I'm always grateful for anything my friends give or make for me. But this year, all I want is to spend the day alone. No fancy birthday wishes, birthday songs, cakes or presents. Having all these just accentuate the misery in me. Sorry I sound depressed but I think I really am. Now I'll go back to crying because only the lizards can hear me at 5am. On the side note, I appreciate the many friends who sent me well wishes, they really made my day. Thanks. :)

MOVING OUT.

KIDDOS, Please let me have some privacy! I'm going to change my blog address cos I found out that my tuition kids stalk me not only in real life but on internet too!! Arrgh.. Not that I'm afraid to let them see anything here, but my blog has never meant to be kid-friendly, which means that every single word I make here has to be censored. I hate having to censor every single word, having been on censorship ever since I tutor. SO, I'M MOVING OUT, real soon!

...

Dear blog, From now on, I will only have you to pour my heart out. Everyone's too busy for me, even myself at times. My family is falling apart and I've never been more miserable. I still remember the last time I was this miserable was when I fell out of love. My school work is overloaded and overdue for a long time but I just have no mood to do anything about it. My life is seriously screwed, even though I'm trying my best to stay afloat. Any jobs to recommend me this coming December? Even though I have always looked forward to Christmas every year, be it receiving or giving, this is my most dreadful year. I hate Christmas and my birthday, more so than anything else.

Individual differences not?

I just uncovered something about individual differences. Not mentally and physically, but social economically. While some people are born with silver spoons and they spend money like water and drive lambos, there are people slogging for the most part of their lives, just to clear debts and be squashed like sandwiches in the train. Wanna know what other variations there are? Living parasites who have no idea they are born with wooden spoons and still have illusions that their parents can feed them with the latest mobile phones every other month. Ouch.

Early present!

Life has been rocky for me lately. My family is in a mess and my school work is piling sky high. On top of all these worries, I'm gonna be "temporarily out of job" soon since my tuition kids' exams are over! Roars... The only consolation today is a pleasant surprise. Slave Yap bought an early birthday present for me! Hehe Here it is! French connection clothes!! Let's welcome the latest membership card to join the mountain of cards I've to trolley along during shopping trips!